“Forget it!  I’ll just do it myself!”  As a husband, I hear those seven words more than I would like to admit.  But the good news is that I’m not alone.  From what I hear, those words are repeated by wives all over the world.  The passivity of men is a global, systemic epidimec.

So what’s a hard-working women to do?  I have an a suggestion for improving spousal performance that doesn’t require you doing what you think you have to do.

Fast Company magazine states in their June edition that 30 million ties were sold in America last year.  However, approximately 25% of those were sold leading up to Father’s Day.  Here’s where it starts to get interesting for frustrated wives – men do not like having to wear ties.

However, Sandy Corsillo, co-founder of the fabric tie company Hill-Side, says, “When a guy wears a tie and gets a compliment, he’s 16 times more likely to buy another tie within a year.”  The lesson -  husbands respond very favorably to compliments from their wives.

Men are a self-fulfilling prophecy.

That’s because a man’s performance is directly tied to his wife’s level of confidence in him.  If you treat your husband like the man you want him to be, often he will live up to and exceed those expectations.  So compliment him early in the day and often.

  1. If your husband starts a diet, immediately tell him he looks like he’s lost weight.  Even if he just had a big piece of pie.
  2. If you need help in the kitchen, tell him how great tasting the food is that he prepares.  Even if he burns water.
  3. If you need something fixed, tell him what a great handyman he is.  Even if he can’t work a hammer.
  4. If you want to cuddle, tell him how romatic he is.  Even if he is clueless.
  5. If you want him to show spiritual leadership, tell him what a great man of character he is.  Even is he can’t find his Bible.
  • Is this coercion?  I say it’s instilling confidence.
  • Is this lying?  I say it’s great leadership.
  • Is this misleading?  I say it’s a mistake not to lead you husbands this way.

Don’t confuse activity with accomplishment.  But of course, I’m a man.

So ladies, if you haven’t attempted the “Compliment Strategy” yet, I recommend you give it a try.  I think you’ll enjoy the results.

Well, I have to go now.  My wife just said she was tired of asking me to take out the trash as she’s carrying two bags to the garbage cans herself!  Oops.

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